They Are Coming For Us!

Does the above picture frighten you? It should. It should chill you to your core.

The freaky robot baby in that picture is one of the most advanced robots in the world. Specially designed to mimic the learning behavior of a human infant, the robot can track things with its eyes, walk around a room, and make me feel uncomfortable from thousands of miles away. The creators of CB2 (Child-robot with Biomimetic Body) hope that the thing will learn how to speak at a two-year old level in the next two years.

While there are probably hundreds of good reasons to develop robots to this level of complexity (many of them are detailed in this article about CB2), I can think of thousands of reasons why it’s not a good idea. Much like the robot scientist who is rapidly replacing lab assistants by making his own discoveries, this freaky robot child is going to someday replace human children.

I mean, hello, didn’t anyone see AI?? Sure, Kubrick died before they actually started filming, and it was right before Haley Joel Osment turned from a talented and endearing child star into a sad and unattractive Hollywood has-been, but the movie still had merit! It taught us that robots, no matter how sweet they are programmed to be, cannot replace our children. In fact, if anything, they’ll grow to resent our obviously inferior intellect and replace us!

So, to help do my part in stopping the spread of robot baby adoption, I present the following YouTube video. Anyone who still wants to have a robot child after watching this video is probably not a human to begin with.

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